What is inner freedom ? And how can you tell if it's here?
I'm asking, not telling. Because I suspect it's nothing like we imagined.
Many years back, I went to hear a spiritual teacher speak about his own enlightenment and ours. ‘You are already that,’ he informed us. ‘Problem is, you don’t believe it’s true, because you can’t feel it for yourself.’ He paused, taking in our squirmy disbelief and added, ‘Your own personal frequency is much higher than you think it is.’
I—and probably every other person in the room—thought, ‘He must mean all of us collectively together have a very high frequency. Not me personally. Because my experience of myself feels like a knuckle-dragging bucket of crap. Why else would I be sitting in this room, hoping to learn how to fix it?’
But it’s true, you know. Of course it is. Your own frequency is much higher than you think it is. And…knowing that, plus five bucks, will buy you a pretty decent cup of coffee. Right?
I mean, it’s alot like that old ‘if a tree falls in the forest’ thing: If your frequency is high and rising, but you experience approximately zero direct evidence of it…does your high frequency actually exist?
Well, yes. Actually it does.
Before we go on, let’s pause here for a sec, to refresh ourselves on what having a high personal frequency actually means:
Everything is resonance, right? We are electromagnetic beings, in constant energetic communication with the (electromagnetic) earth below and (yes, electromagnetic) skies above.
And then on top of that, we are gifted with an entire smorgasbord of (electromagnetic) frequency options—from very low to incredibly high—to choose from, in the way we conduct our day to day lives: Our ways of thinking, acting, speaking and being, all of which resonate at particular frequencies. And those frequencies determine, at least in part, the type and quality (or not), of our energetic communication/communion with heaven and earth.
We’re obviously not all doing, thinking and being angelic all of the time. (Or maybe that’s just me. But somehow I doubt it.) Yet from what I can gather, our natural high frequencies are simply a given. Part of being human. As such, they’re untouchable; non-degradable.
But the way we live our lives, creates the fluctuating frequency conditions farther down the resonance scale. These are what determine, in part, how (or if) we’re in touch with those unchanging natural high frequencies.
Because divinity, AKA our own true natural identity, registers somewhere on the (infinitely?) high end of that electromagnetic resonance scale. So our own ‘daily life’ frequency field needs to be pretty darn clear, high and coherent, in order to resonate with it.
Even so, this natural human ability of ours is still pretty amazing, right? Communicating and communing with heaven and earth in every moment—whether we’re currently conscious of it or not? Incredible.
Except that, as I’ve said, most of us (including moi), find that all of this infinite beauty is happening entirely outside, or beyond, our own ability to feel it. Beyond our frequency bandwidth, in other words. Yet it is indeed going on, more or less without us.
The reasons are undoubtedly many, for our profound disconnect from our own natural birthright of unfettered divinity. (Distraction by noisier, lower frequency, societal wavelengths being just one of them.) All in all, I suspect it’s not quite as cut and dried as Enlightened Guy suggested back then. It’s not just disbelief in the reality of our own divine nature, that holds us back.
Nevertheless. Each one of us can, theoretically, consciously know our own selves as the sacred conduit itself, between heaven and earth. To not only become conscious of, but to operate exclusively from, our own pristinely high frequency field. Taking our true divine place, as members of the symphony of wholeness; sounding our own unique individual frequency note, as part of a joyous harmony, sung eternally throughout the universe.
How exquisite—in potential, at least—this business of being human.
If/when we’re consciously connected and fully aware of our own high frequency—which is always already here; it’s who we really are—then this flow of sacred connection would surely inform our daily choices, moment to moment. We’d interact with the world according to divine inspiration and heart-based knowing, as it shows up freshly in each ‘now.’
I don’t know about you, but that strikes me as a pretty incredible way to live.
Yet here we are. In these curious times, our own personal frequency field (and that of planet earth itself) are inexorably continuing to rise, and rise, and rise some more. Ready or not. Resonant or not. Whether we’re in touch with our own true divine nature, or not at all.
So what happens then? What happens when our own personal frequency scales the mountaintop and goes soaring off into the great beyond? If we’re still oblivious—if our own more mundane, daily field is not yet sublimely clear and coherent, nor already connected to All That Is…would we even know it’s happening?
Most of us rarely, if ever, feel our own resting frequency: that energetic tapestry that we identify as ‘me.’ I feel mine (but only when I actively tune in and go looking for it) due to an interesting event dating back to the earliest days of my Buddhist practice.
I was still very much a novice Buddhist, when I was unexpectedly engulfed by an agonizing bout of Bad Boyfriend Syndrome. Instantly I became lost in my own sticky, self-generated goo, running autopilot patterns of unstoppably self-defeating behavior. And I didn’t know why.
With desperate fire in the belly, I sat down and chanted for some kind of clarity—some way of understanding, something that could grant me the ability to clean up my own patterns.
That prayer was answered.
Suddenly I was swept back in time, to re-experience my own troublesome birth. (Which gave me the answers I’d been searching for.)
I’ll spare you the details, except for this: In that birth event, I was astonished to discover that ‘I,’ the unborn infant ‘me,’ felt exactly like the 27 year-old adult ‘me.’ Nothing to do with the intellect, and minus the history and baggage accumulated since. Nevertheless, I was unmistakably me.
So ever since that birth recall experience, I’ve found it quite easy to look within and isolate that ‘feeling of me.’ The resting frequency of me, would be another way of putting it.
Everyone can do this, by the way. It’s not special, and requires no talent. I was just lucky enough to have it shown to me in a way that was impossible to miss. Because back then, I was pretty good at missing things.
Years later…back to that teacher in the room…
After speaking to us of our own high frequency, he sought to prove it to us by urging us to go within, and locate that ‘feeling of me.’
No prob, right? I hadn’t tried it since that earlier rebirth experience, but I dropped in easily, expecting to encounter that same clear, pure ‘me’ I’d felt at birth.
To my surprise, the feeling of ‘me’… was kind of depressive. A bit thick and gloopy, actually. This was not at all my daily conscious experience of myself at the time. I wouldn’t have described myself as depressed, nor buried under the goo of my historical baggage. (On the other hand…there was that knuckle-dragging bucket of crap thing. Hmm.)
In the intervening decades after being born, it seemed I’d acquired quite a few heavy blankets draped over that pure ‘feeling of me.’
I haven’t, as a rule, made a habit of tuning in to monitor the progress of my own rising frequency. Is it higher this month, or lower? Damn, should I have given more abundantly to charity last year, or something?
But Jacqueline Hobbs, one of the bright lights I respect most, often speaks of ‘feeling the feeling of you.’ So I’ve been feeling the feeling of me pretty regularly these days. When I first began it, those same old blankets were still firmly in place. I wasn’t too distressed about it; over time, I’d actually come to identify those heavy blankets themselves, as the feeling of me.
A year or so later, I gradually started to notice a lightening of the heavy bedding. Yet my actual experience of my daily self hadn’t noticeably changed. Well, maybe a few random improvements here and there, but overall? More or less the same as ever.
Rising, rising, rising…
Recently I tuned back in to feel the feeling of me…and funnily enough, ‘I’ was nowhere to be found. Not only were the blankets gone, but the ‘me’ I came in with, was missing as well. In its place, just a serene spaciousness occupying the spot where ‘I’ used to be.
What does that feel like, you may ask? Is there an incredible sense of inner freedom now permeating my daily being?
Nah.
My frequency, apparently, (just like everybody else’s and that of the earth itself), is off the charts and soaring. Pretty much without me. And I’ve no way of gauging whether there’s been any meaningful progress in my daily personal field, toward coherent resonance with the whole. I’d like to hope so.
It would be nice to imagine that I might actually experience myself as that, at some point sooner rather than later. It would be even nicer to imagine that every person alive on this planet might do the same.
Our personal frequencies are rising-rising-rising. Are you yourself able to detect that incremental elevation? If so, does your daily life feel any different as a result?
Just wondering.
PS Ending with those questions is not me trolling for comments. Personally I find those ‘personal’ questions at the end of a blog post kind of annoying, because I know it’s just a fake (and overused) technique, meant to generate reader engagement.
I’m asking you, because I genuinely want to know.
You know me, I pay attention and yep, my frequency got boosted, in a most unusual way, and it continues. My husband and I recently spent 3 months in Arizona. His brother has stage 4 cancer, and dementia. His wife, 7 years younger, also sliding into dementia. Her brother and his wife, live nearby and needed some help. There is always something thrilling for me as I leap into an unknown void. Have never been around dementia, had no idea what I was doing. An ongoing thought that I had was that I was to be in service to them both, whatever that meant. Also, have never been a fan of the desert. We rented a casita nearby and as Spring arrived, we were treated daily to javelinas parading by with their babies, in the arroyos behind our courtyard. And then quails with their new brood and roadrunners showing off their cute little puffers. Every morning I was greeted by doves cooing: I love you you you. Pretty amazing. My brother in law is like a 7 year old. He is in no pain, still loves to eat and drink beer and we would walk daily. He has no idea he is dying, not a bad way to go. When we first arrived, he asked me to go to the front lawn with him to wash our hands in the sand. He told me the Mountain Witches were coming with their spears and by washing our hands in the sand, their spears could not hurt us. Well, wow! This is his new reality and my job is to honor it. I was beginning to realize that this could be a lot of fun. He has always been funny, and now operating in a different arena. In her early stages, my sister in law is easily confused. She wonders why Hospice is involved because he is fine. By looking at him, you would think so. She has not been paying their bills, not taking her medication, nor giving him his, forgetting to eat or feed him BUT she thinks she has. A lot to figure out. I carried their meds around in my van, dispensing them morning and evening. Every morning when I arrived, she would tell me she had just made them breakfast, and in her reality, it was true. I would ask him if he was still hungry and he would tell me he would like a breakfast sandwich, and then she would tell me that she may as well have one, too. Every Single Day. The only real stress that I had was Someone who kept insisting that we needed to clear up their mess. They have a gorgeous home, and they are hoarders. I had gone through this same type of scenario with my Mom, so I knew their "stuff" was very important to them. Someone would arrive daily, and began going through their cupboards, etc. They would both become visibly manic, but would not say anything. The very next morning, I woke up to this thought, complete with lights, in my mind: Expect delight every moment. What a wondrous message and a new way to live. It became my mantra FOR EVERYTHING. I arrived that morning and my sister in law said she would like a break from Someone. Uh, OK, how do we go about this? She said "throw me under the bus, I don't care and I don't trust her". Someone shows up, begins more decluttering and I told her that it was hard on their souls, and to please stop. She told me it needed to be done, and I said: yes, but not right now. I gave her the message that they would like a break from her and then, magically she kind of disappeared for most of the rest of the time I was there. All my stress flew out the window, and we began a new adventure. It was like falling in love, all over again, with someone you have known for years, but now live in a different world. We have been home for over a month now, and the shift has become permanent. The very best part for me is that I am aware that I am living it.
I don't feel my month-to-month frequencies rising.... and always figured (and hoped) they would.
I do feel more love from Spirit, more of turning away from the ego, and a joining of all. I put this down to my many years (and continuing everyday) of A Course In Miracles and its forgiveness. I am super thankful to remember throughout the day to forgive and hand up to the Holy Spirit, and I also remember to 'sit' in the theatre with Jesus, holding arms and watch my life go by on the large screen.
I still don't feel any guidance....... But my job right now is to forgive, forgive and forgive. And extend love.
Thanks for your very enlightening posts.
Robyn Quaintance
Saturna, B.C. Canada